Today the Inside Magic Daily News is being written on a very small
keyboard attached to the even smaller mobile phone I purchased just to
get this copy in the system. “Where’s the big computer?” you may
ask. “Did you have to pawn it again to support your
addictions?” “Why are you so into clown shoes anyway?”
“You’re the Imelda Marcos of over-sized, gaudy colored, ugly
shoes!”
“Ha,” I say. “Imelda Marcos’ shoes
were more over-sized and ugly than any of the used clown footwear I
incessantly purchase.”
I have not lost my big shoes or my
gas-powered computer. I cannot operate the wireless transmitter
on a blimp over municipalities of more than 100,000 citizens. I
can, however, use a cellular telephone regardless of the size of the
city over which we noisily float.
Despite their appearance
from the ground, blimp travel has got to be one of the noisiest modes
around. I believe I am deaf and we are only half-way to Chicago.
The noise is likely the reason the FAA doesn’t care if you use a
cellular phone in-flight. You can’t hear a thing.
There
are not many of us left in the business; Blimp Performers. So
many were lost or scared off by the horrific Hindenburg and Graf
Zeppelin accidents — even though modern blimps use the inert and
non-flammable helium gas. I got this gig from a prop-comic who
was retiring after 22 years of entertaining executives and paying
customers aboard one of the seven commercial blimps in our US
skies.
Back in the Day – Goodyear’s Fleet
One’s magic must be pithy and silent to be
a success on a blimp. Passengers can become nauseous with any
cross-wind diminishing their attention span and willingness to read
your lips as you scream “pick a card!”
We have a mime on
board to perform tomorrow night and Friday morning. I have
already done two close-up sessions (sponge balls and chop cup) and in a
few minutes I’ll be on for a 21 minute session featuring silks, silks,
streamers, and silks.
My predecessor screamed some
parting words my way as we took my maiden voyage. “Once you stop
throwing up, it will be like riding a bike but with better
smells.”
Today the Inside Magic Daily News is being written on a very small
keyboard attached to the even smaller mobile phone I purchased just to
get this copy in the system. “Where’s the big computer?” you may
ask. “Did you have to pawn it again to support your
addictions?” “Why are you so into clown shoes anyway?”
“You’re the Imelda Marcos of over-sized, gaudy colored, ugly
shoes!”
“Ha,” I say. “Imelda Marcos’ shoes
were more over-sized and ugly than any of the used clown footwear I
incessantly purchase.”
I have not lost my big shoes or my
gas-powered computer. I cannot operate the wireless transmitter
on a blimp over municipalities of more than 100,000 citizens. I
can, however, use a cellular telephone regardless of the size of the
city over which we noisily float.
Despite their appearance
from the ground, blimp travel has got to be one of the noisiest modes
around. I believe I am deaf and we are only half-way to Chicago.
The noise is likely the reason the FAA doesn’t care if you use a
cellular phone in-flight. You can’t hear a thing.
There
are not many of us left in the business; Blimp Performers. So
many were lost or scared off by the horrific Hindenburg and Graf
Zeppelin accidents — even though modern blimps use the inert and
non-flammable helium gas. I got this gig from a prop-comic who
was retiring after 22 years of entertaining executives and paying
customers aboard one of the seven commercial blimps in our US
skies.
Back in the Day – Goodyear’s Fleet
One’s magic must be pithy and silent to be
a success on a blimp. Passengers can become nauseous with any
cross-wind diminishing their attention span and willingness to read
your lips as you scream “pick a card!”
We have a mime on
board to perform tomorrow night and Friday morning. I have
already done two close-up sessions (sponge balls and chop cup) and in a
few minutes I’ll be on for a 21 minute session featuring silks, silks,
streamers, and silks.
My predecessor screamed some
parting words my way as we took my maiden voyage. “Once you stop
throwing up, it will be like riding a bike but with better
smells.”
The incredible Avner the Eccentric performs his new show Exceptions to Gravity
is listed officially in the San Francisco papers as a comedy. But
like the theme of his show, his act defies easy definition.
The beautiful San Jose Repertory Theater in San Jose, California, will attempt to contain the incredible energy and imagination through July 17th.
Do you think we think Avner is pretty good?
He is more than eccentric; he is amazing.
The San Francisco Chronicle’s
theater critic had praise for Avner’s imaginative work. “It’s a bit of
juggling, some impressive dashes of subtle sleight of hand and a great
deal of masterful physical comedy, performed with impeccable precision,
adding up to 80 minutes of enjoyable, at times hilarious entertainment.”
Avner
wrote, directed and stars in the unique show. The premise is
interesting. The audience watches what takes place in the five
minutes before a show. Avner plays the part of a janitor sweeping
up after a puppet show. Nothing cooperates with his cleaning
efforts. Almost instantly he is caught interlocked with “his
broom, cigarettes, his derby, sweater, pants and uncooperative tongue.”
The
critic notes the show gives a “rare chance to experience the talents of
a widely respected comic master.” Avner performs many of the
sight gags he has perfected over the years. His innovative
comedic body work was part of the basis for his induction into the
prestigious International Clown Hall of Fame. His understanding
of how to sell the sleights, moves and falls is why the time-honored
routines are still performed “a spontaneity that makes them seem newly
minted.”
The penultimate paragraph of the favorable review sums it up:
It’s
in this kind of classic clown routine, however familiar, that Eisenberg
is freshest and funniest. He’s the solitary, unassuming modern mortal
continually overwhelmed by everyday objects and mishaps but overcoming
each self-inflicted problem, coming up with ridiculously convoluted
ways to retrieve his hat from a long stick, reach a fallen object or
simply put his hat back on his head. The blissfully deft magic tricks
add to the delight in his understated dexterity.
Congratulations
to Avner for his current success. Thank you also for the years of
great entertainment and instruction. We are fortunate to be
living in the same era as Avner. He is eccentric as that word is
traditionally defined and in all of its positive, modern-day
connotations. He is unique and not to be missed.
Several newspapers and
wire news services are reporting today Roy Horn has been transported to
Leonardis Clinic in Bad Heilbrunn in Bavaria to continue his
recovery. One of the more complete versions of the story can be
found on the BBC website.
Mr.
Horn was nearly fatally wounded when attacked by his 7-year-old, 380
pound tiger, Montecore during a live show on his 59th birthday.
He issued a statement from his hospital bed saying he is “delighted”
with the way things are progressing in his physical therapy. “I
am so happy and grateful for the tremendous support that my friends and
fans have shown here in Germany,” Mr. Horn said. “But I must ask you to
respect my privacy.”
Mr. Horn’s request for privacy comes amid an increase in rumors of his current condition.
As
a consequence of the intrusive reports, Mr. Horn’s physicians have been
required to deny reports their patient is undergoing fetal pig cell
therapy similar to that used for Parkinson’s patients.
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