The Gifts of Christmas Made Magical

Inside Magic's New Object of Our Unrequited Creepy Feelings - Nozomi SasakiNathan Kranzo is an established Inside Magic favorite and regular at Mystic Hollow’s magic bar The Thumb Tip Inn.

Nathan Kranzo dropped us a line to boast he has completed his Holiday shows and has apparently completed shopping and/or decided which household objects will be re-gifted to loved ones.

We have finished nothing. We had great plans for this year. We were going to develop a comprehensive schedule for shows, surveys, and shopping. We thought it wise to include “surveying” as a task this year to ensure our gifts were desired – or would at least be tolerated.

Our idea of giving library books last year did not earn the type of admiration and praise we expected. We thought it showed the ultimate in consideration and thought.

It was a gift they would return and yet we picked out books we thought they would enjoy. Some saw it as cheap. Coincidentally, those who considered our gesture miserly, were the very same who failed to return the books on time, thereby incurring late fees.

In the spirit of the holidays, we offered to split the penalties but some recipients lacked the grace and maturity to accept the offer without sarcasm or acerbic comments about us.

Those people are off our list this year. That means we only need to buy for two people outside the immediate family.  And yet, we still have not moved in any substantive way to make those purchases. Danger lurks where procrastination encounters frugality.

For the man who takes care of our car, we intend to buy a gift certificate to an area dry cleaner.

We realize tow truck operators are not supposed to be judged on their cleanliness or fashion sense, but every time we see him hitching up our 5 cylinder Mustang GT, he looks slovenly.

We think people would feel more accepting of his lowly and despicable job of repossessing vehicles if he dressed as if he was doing a job rather than engaging in a very annoying hobby.

For our newest object of far-away and unrequited feelings of inappropriate desires, Nozomi Sasaki, we will keep with tradition and send her what we sent to her predecessors in the role of object of creepy attention, a custom made block of Post-It Notes® with poetry on each individual sheet.

Miss Sasaki is what the Japanese call a gravure idol.  We have no idea what “gravure” means.  At first we thought it was that jelly that has bits of rind mixed in.  Apparently that is not even close.  You can see Nozomi Sasaki as the front person for Lotte’s Fit Gum campaign here.  She performs magic but we feel very confident the transformations are camera trickery, though. Be careful listening, however. The song will stick to your brain like well-chewed gum.

Neither Tonya Harding or Lindsay Lohan ever returned our gifts or turned it over to local authorities as evidence, ergo, it is the perfect gift.

But because Nozomi Sasaki is Japanese, we spent extra time writing many of the poems in Haiku form. We are thoughtful, no?

Here is one of the poems:

Magic performing

Hoping to back palm whole deck

Fingers bleed always

But Nathan Kranzo does not have to worry about creating an international incident by sending an unsolicited gift about bloody digits trying to back palm 52 cards effectively. Nay, he has completed his work. He can now play with his kids and offer readers of Inside Magic a gift.

Mr. Kranzo describes his gift as “one of my favorite card effects.”

We understand he has not tipped it before today and we can see why. It is very good and we really like the patter.

CLICK HERE FOR YOUR FREE HOLIDAY CARD EFFECT!!!
But that’s not all, Mr. Kranzo is also offering a Buy One – Get One Free sale through January 2, 2011.

Order any of his more than 27 DVDs, effects, or downloads, and get another one of lesser value for free.

After you order, send Mr. Kranzo an email at nathankranzo@gmail.com and he’ll hook you up.

Be sure to check out his great site here: www.kranzomagic.com.

Kranzometer Predicts Secret Page Access!

Nathan Kranzo is always busy: developing new magic, reviving old, forgotten gimmicks or techniques, or just “puttin’ stuff out there” for everyone’s consideration.

In fact, the Kranzometer indicated he was due for something pretty special any day now. We remembered that we needed to set the Kranzometer forward 55 minutes for Daylight Savings Time and that gave us a precise date and time — precisely five minutes before we started this article.

So confident were we in the Kranzometer’s accuracy that we actually wrote this article before he announced his special Thanksgiving Week gift. We knew we could write the article and just leave a blank here and there. They would be filled in precisely when the Kranzometer predicted.

The fact that you are reading this article and it is without blanks inappropriately joined, run-on sentences proves value of the Swiss movement and 23 jewels in our device. Other web sites purchase their Kranzometer’s second-hand or knock-offs of the Official Kranzometer; the same as used in the Olympic Games, Professional Rodeo Cowboys Association, and Inside Magic, made only by Wittenaur.

Mr. Kranzo has a secret page and he has decided to make its address available to Inside Magic readers. We understand it will be available only through the Thanksgiving week. Some of the material shared is absolutely killer. Some of it is more adult oriented and some is a lot more adult oriented.

Mr. Kranzo writes in his introduction on the secret page:

These routines and gags were created by performing for real people in restaurants, bars, elementary schools, private parties, keggers, bonfires, comedy clubs, colleges, corporate events, theaters, trade shows, brothels, bar mitzvahs and after dinner engagements.

These routines are very customizable. I’ll give you the basic gag so you can take the idea and go any direction you’d like. In this way you will add your own personality and in doing so we will all have something unique.

Most of these effects and gags were designed for stand up performances but many can be performed close up and play just as well.


Continue reading Kranzometer Predicts Secret Page Access!

Nathan Kranzo Hit in UK

Nathan Kranzo - international star

We are proud of Nathan Kranzo We discovered him when we were a nobody. Yes, he was already well known and famous but were and still are a struggling (psychologically) virtual rag on a gas powered server with a small staff and rapidly spreading staph infection.

Now, some 10 years after we first met Mr. Kranzo in Las Vegas only to learn his home is about 23 clicks from our town of Mystic Hollow, MI, he is an international star of multiple magic disciplines.

Ironically, we initially received shock therapy for Multiple Magic Discipline Disorder until it was dropped from the DSM (The Psychology Bible on diagnosis and treatment) and our insurance refused to pay for our visits.

We read with interest and caffeine and nicotine based attention that his trip to our former owners, England has been more than successful. (More than successful in that we presume he not only received adulation, great reviews, and new fans but was also likely paid for doing so).

This from the essential read, Magic Convention Guide:

Northern Magic Circle 2010 – Gala Show Nathan Kranzo hails from Michigan and is a super talented close-up performer and it became apparent a very funny stage guy too, damn him! He opened with a great Paper Heart restoration, transforming it to a Heart Balloon, incorporating a very funny squeaker gag. His Mindreading Crotch trick was an hilarious Named Card to Fly, and finally Nathan closed his set with a Borrowed Ring to Lemon.

(http://www.magicconventionguide.com/2010/northern-magic-circle-2010-gala-show/)

If there is one thing we know, it is that we have very limited knowledge about things. We tend to see things as perfected with little need or room for improvement. Hence our Ill-fated investment in the long-forgotten soft drink 6-UP.

Mr. Kranzo is costantly upping the stakes with improvements on his already perfect inventions.

We say, Bully for Him. Check out his blog and store at: http://www.KranzoMagic.com.